In case you missed it, our media, who is way cooler and savvier then the cool kids you knew in high school and therefore never falls for those tired and true ploys like unlimited rumors and speculation opportunities that politicians may throw at them, has been all over a Very Important story for the past day and a half. Seems like the major news that everyone needs to know about today is that John McCain, the most mavericky of mavericks that has ever resided on Maverick Avenue, has out-mavericked even himself and suspended his campaign out of his selfless love for country over politics.
Yes, instead of appearing in the spotlight anywhere he wanted to in the country, McCain has instead bravely decided to drag the spotlight back to the Washington with him, because McCain, who has missed every Senate vote since April and even manages to beat a Senator that had a brain hemorrhage in missed votes in the Senate, is well known to put country first, even if that means limiting his photo opportunities to meetings with the president and congress in Washington rather then small town diners across the US. After his announcement, McCain proceeded to immediately head to Washington, after going on three of the major networks (but not David Letterman's show because he didn't have time for that). He did this not to campaign and make himself appealing to voters, but to instead talk about how heâs suspending the campaign because he really loves the country, which is totally different then appealing to voters. After making those rounds to make sure that a concerned country knew where he stood on suspending his campaign, giving a speech he had scheduled, and spending the night, McCain then gave his dramatic battle cry and rushed the next day, leading a gaggle of reporters with him, to Washington. Once there, in a major show of the leadership he promised, he proceeded to hide in his office and then sit quietly in meetings as congress blew up around him.
But that's not all! In order to show that even his insides are stuffed with even more mavericky goodness, McCain has even suggested that we postpone Friday's debate until an agreement is rushed through congress, because it is never in the county's best interest for congress to think too much about major pieces of legislation that may have a major impact on life as we know it, not to mention that the worst thing for the country right now would be to hear our two potential next presidents talk about a major crisis like the current economy and market collapse when we are on the verge of picking a new leader that will tackle the economic meltdown. Helpfully, McCain understands and has decided that perhaps the debate can move to next Tuesday, which coincidentally would replace the VP debate between Sarah "short answers only" Palin and Joe Biden that is supposed to take place that day. Sarah Palin, fresh off of the overwhelmingly positive buzz that her interviews with Charles Gibson and Katie Couric has given her, is sure to be almost as disappointed by this change as the McCain camp will inevitably be, being that they are obviously anxious to show more of her to the public that will be voting 37 in days. However, like the true patriots they are, they will put aside selfishness and keep Palin tucked and hidden away for just a little longer, perhaps for 37 days, if that's what it takes to help the country.
As evidenced by the media flurry and hype over McCain's selfless decision to suspend his campaign in a time of national crisis, it is evident that McCain always puts country ahead of himself and his politics. And in case you aren't quite sure yet, I'm positive that if you are to turn on the TV, some reporter, who is totally not one of those media representatives that's been completely suckered by McCain, will keep you informed at how the McCain campaign suspension is going. And if that doesn't convince you, surely McCain's aides, who have been making the rounds for McCain on network and cable news stations since the suspension was announced, can convince you. But whatever you do, don't take into consideration things like McCain and his aides appearing on news stations to promote his candidacy after the suspension was announced, McCain's complete failure to give a response or even useful input to the congressional meeting after demanding all over the media that solutions be found immediately, the convenient shift of attention from the train wreck that is Sarah Palin to McCain's drama fest, or the queasy feeling in your stomach that comes with the knowledge that a potential leader for the next four years has just used and abused a national crisis for the American people and turned it into an occasion to tout himself as an ideal candidate. Obviously, to anyone that isn't a biased hack that puts country ahead of politics just like McCain, this whole situation is not a cheap political stunt, but just a lucky coincidence for McCain to show how much he truly loves his country.
*And now that Congress is no closer to reaching and agreement on a solution, McCain has kept true to his word and stated that he will participate in the debates.